The Taste of Medicine
by West-Door-88
Summary: "Never in my life... have I craved to devour something... Bon Appétit..." OCxMikan
1. Chapter 1: Taste the Past

**Hi. I'm West-Door. Suddenly, I woke up and decided to write my fifth fanfic. I just decided to do so. I know that I have to write more of my 'Drifters' fanfic and my 'Kuroinu' fanfic, but I'm the author and I get to decide what I write. So please don't go to the review section to bombard me for not continuing two of my stories kay? I'm currently writing chapter 2 of 'Murasaki decided he needed more Drifters' and almost finished with chapter 2 of '광대 거지와 다혈질 쪼다의 두근두근한 모험'. So please wait patiently. All will come in time.**

 **...**

 **Well then~ I hope you enjoy it~!**

 **I don't own Danganronpa and I only own the OC character in here. Danganronpa belongs to Spike.**

* * *

Hunger.

The first emotion I felt. Well… can we even call that an emotion? I guess calling it a symptom is a more appropriate term. A feeling of pain triggered by our body's need and craving for consumption of nutrients, vitamins and other vital consumables that allows our bodies to function properly… That was the first emotion I felt. More specifically, it was the first emotion I remember feeling.

I was so hungry and being a nobody on the streets, being nothing to anybody among everybody didn't help me ease the pain. The pain got worse and I wanted to ease the pain. I tried sleeping but sleeping meant at one point I was bound to be awake. It didn't work. I ate anything in the garbage. I threw up everything. I tried to steal. They beated me into a bloody pulp. I tried begging. Nobody gave a damn. In the slums, nobody would shed a tear at my death, nobody would be sad for my death, that much I instinctively knew.

They would be glad if I died.

But I didn't, and he did. Him, being an old man living all by himself in a small shack, picking empty bottles and used cardboard for his living, died because he was weak. But he was an old man who was kind enough to hand me a piece of food when I was at the verge of dying of hunger. But, I'm glad he is dead. At least I could eat those rice he cooked. The living need food and the last time I checked, the dead don't. I scooped up a spoonful of rice with my tiny hands and winced as the searing hotness of the steamy white rice harmed my rough hands. Rough hands for somebody who is only five years old. Rough red hands dripping the scarlet fluids between my fingers that once held a piece of glass that penetrated the old man's jugular.

I ate the rice forgetting to wash my hands. Oops.

…

Why do I have to wash my hands?

I'm hungry and I didn't like that feeling and I learned that eating decreased the pain. I don't like pain. It hurts and it's scary.

…

…

…

…

…

Eh? Who's that?

* * *

He's using me.

That was what I began to think of the man who took me in. Apparently, it seems like he had heard the old man yell before he gurgled on his blood. He said he liked my eyes, and I said I was hungry. He said he'll feed me, and I said I'll kill for him. A wordless contract was made between us.

I was his favorite. I killed without hesitation because I feared hunger. I killed with no remorse to eat. I killed giving no shit whatsoever to avoid being in pain, the pain being hunger. I wasn't like the rest of the 'cowards' who would hesitate or break down crying from killing somebody. Those 'cowards' were taken somewhere by our 'Father' and they never returned.

I was 'Father's favorite. I killed, and killed, and killed, and killed, and killed, and killed, and killed, and killed, and killed, and killed, and killed, and killed, and killed. I ate, and ate, and ate, and ate, and ate, and ate, and ate, and ate, and ate, and ate, and ate, and ate, and ate.

But one day, I wanted to be free. Freedom was a weird word and it took a considerable amount of time for me to understand its meaning, but I succeeded in knowing. The emotion to be free started when I killed the lady with her baby. I didn't like the lady but I liked the baby, but all witnesses had to die. The baby was screaming because he was alive and he died because he was killed. By my knife.

…

…

…

I didn't like this mission, even when I got to eat to decrease hunger I didn't like it. I didn't like 'Father' using me to do something I didn't really wanted to do. So, I decided to have something called freedom. No. I wanted to free of choosing my targets so I asked if I could.

'Father' hit me with his brass knuckles and declared that he would starve me if I said anything like that again.

Starve=Hunger=Pain

Fuck no. I am going to kill that man. I am not going to rely on him to fight off hunger. But what if he gets killed and die? Then how am I going to eat? I want to be free so I can feed myself but how can I do that? I don't even know how to feed myself.

I was too scared to claim independence. If 'Father' died, then how am I going to eat and keep hunger away from me? The only way I knew how to eat was him providing me food. So I did nothing for the fear of hunger haunted my mind.

* * *

Fortunately, it only took me two years to find independence when I made a name in the underground organization. Somehow I got into close with the Kuzuryū group who were one of the biggest Yakuza groups in Japan. During the two years I tried my best to learn how to gain independence from 'Father' but still eat to fight hunger. I learned a lot of things such as how to smile like a 'normal' person, or what 'manners' were, or learning that the Earth is round. I still can't imagine the shock I had when I learned that.

I self-taught myself how to read and write. I taught myself how to act and lie. I learned how to kill people in many different ways. I learned how to use a gun, daggers, knives, guns with a silencer. I learned how to dismantle and put together a gun. I learned how humans acted. I learned how to leave nothing behind. I learned how to sew which became something called a 'hobby'.

…

Sewing makes me warm, and I guess that's what people call 'happiness'.

…

…

…

I also made a 'friend' of one of 'Father's 'Children'. She calls me onii-san, which means big brother.

…

Somehow, I feel happy when she calls me that.

Her name was Harukawa. Harukawa Maki, but I call her Maki-chan. I pat her head and pinch her cheeks on a daily routine and she squeaks but never forces me to stop. So I continue. It feels nice to do so but for some reason I thought it would be a bad idea to do it in front of 'Father' so I didn't and I told Maki-chan to ignore me when 'Father' was around.

I wonder how it feels like to have a last name. I don't even remember mine. Maki-chan says it feels just right and I agree with her. The last name Harukawa seems to fit well with Maki-chan and I do feel that it fits 'right' on her. I wonder how that would feel.

* * *

After meeting with the Kuzuryū group and their soon to be heir, I decided that I could find independence of being an assassin. The Kuzuryū group did tell me that they would help me raise my reputation throughout the underground for they had a debt to pay me for assassinating their rivals.

So, with Maki-chan, I slit 'Father's throat with his razor blade and burnt our 'nest' to the ground.

…

Technically, we made it explode using 'gas', a bullet, and a microwave.

I have to eat. No. _We_ have to eat. Hunger is my nightmare and I don't want them to be Maki-chan's nightmare too.

* * *

Now I use Maki-chan's last name; Harukawa, as Maki-chan gave me permission. It doesn't feel 'right' yet but slowly and surely, it starts to seem right.

I have made a decision that Maki-chan and I had to go to a place called 'school'. I made this decision for, I believed that staying in a public place and being in the midst of ordinary people conversing and interact, we can learn 'empathy', and other human emotions and behaviors, quirks, habits and so on. Also, it didn't seem like a bad idea to hide in plain sight.

At daytime we attended this 'school'. At night, we went to work. Enrolling school was hard to do, but with a few yen and fabricated documents, we managed to get in.

I learned how to 'smile' but for some reason my Maki-chan wouldn't do so. At this point I think I'm around thirteen and Maki thinks she's around ten. We both don't know when we were born or where we were born. But it didn't matter as long as we were together.

…

…

…

And eat together.

* * *

Middle-school is strange. Everybody thinks that being violent is being cool, or being an uptight person is cool. Thankfully, Maki-chan and I aren't that well-known among our peers nor are we considered loners. We are… ordinary. Too ordinary that we rarely cross other people's minds. That's good. I wouldn't want to draw unwanted attention from anybody who sees our faces in broad daylight. We dressed plain, acted plain, and interacted to a sensible amount. Not too much to gain populace, or not too little to be noticed. Our faces are invisible to the underground except for a few high-ranking Kuzuryū group members. If they wanted, they could easily track our school, but not where we actually live.

However, it began hard for me to tread on being 'normal' as my blankets became insanely popular during the school festival. I had to contribute something to the festival and I decided that I would bring over something that I had sewn myself. Then some adult who came visiting our school festival managed to get this 'high-quality' blanket onto his blog. It spread like wildfire as some other school students began to post my blanket on social media deaf to my plea of privacy. One day, I woke up to be famous.

That was the biggest mistake ever. Or is it? Well, I suppose that nobody will consider that I am an assassin at night when I'm just a harmless boy who has talent in wielding a needle and a thread, instead of a knife and a gun. Except for Kuzuryū Fuyuhiko and his tool Pekoyama Peko. The word tool seems a little disagreeable to me. Probably it was because it reminded me the relationship between 'Father' and I.

* * *

After a few years Maki-chan suggested that we open up a clothing shop where I can sell everything I have knitted, sewed, designed, and dyed. One reason was because of the excessive amount of clothing we had in our house and the people who came to school seeking to buy my products, produced out of my hobby. The other reason was because of a back up plan. Being an assassin was a dangerous job and from time to time one of us would get injured from a mission. Fortunately, none of the injuries were everlasting, nor did they leave a scar, but just because we are safe now doesn't mean that we are continuously be safe.

Once you enter and work in the underground, there's no such thing as retirement. Even if you officially 'retire', you will be targeted by many people full of vengeance and bloodlust for your past. I learned this when Maki-chan and I obtained a commission from a client saying that he wanted a certain old man dead who retired from being a yakuza who happened to kill and rape a girl he once liked.

I asked Fuyuhiko(yes, Maki-chan and I have the permission to call Fuyuhiko Fuyuhiko, from the yakuza himself and his tool) if doing something like this was a problem and his response was a shake of his head with a scowl.

" _I really don't think it'll matter that much but on the safe side, cover your tracks well or make it up as if it was an accident of a heart attack. You never know if the boss of his organization still feels some emotions for his retired subordinate"_

So, if we got seriously injured that put us out of work as an assassin, the clothing shop would be our alternative way of earning money. Even when it was scary to try this new, inexperienced path, we did our best and even some of the rich students supported us, saying that they were willing to buy my garments.

Normal people are weird. What I make isn't that much of a deal.

So we opened a clothing store that at first only opened in night or on weekends, but with Kuzuryū's support of sending two retired whores he had in possession(I-it's not like I care about you and your sister and your stupid fucking shop o-or your damn good suits! Now get the fuck outta my face dipshit!) we now open the store on weekdays with us in school and the women at the store. They don't know what we really are and I found that to be uncomfortable, for there was a risk of getting our identities to leak out if one of the workers. Thankfully they don't suspect a thing and seem to be glad of doing this kind of work. They are also so fond of me and of Maki-chan ever since we gave them a few pieces of clothing as a welcome gift when they first came here, out of this unreasonable thing called 'courtesy' and to make sure our 'kind' persona remains. Before I knew it, the two women became part of our life as we would converse a lot of which clothing was sold the most or which one was popular or financial incomes and outcomes.

They talk about how lucky they are to work in such a peaceful workplace unlike that whorehouse they used to work in.

Up to this point, Maki-chan and I still have no idea why adults enjoy having sex that much. We thought of doing it together to experiment the feeling of having sex but decided not to for it said that having sex between siblings were a social taboo. And since it said that having sex makes a lot of loud noises, we decided not to have sex for the walls have ears. Our social statuses have to remain 'good' for both of our sakes.

When I've became a celebrity, Maki-chan managed to avoid of being in such a position and she is glad for not rising up to popularity. Being popular was annoying and troublesome. Everybody knew who you were just by looking at your face, and they would always ask for an autograph. Don't these people have a sense of privacy or common sense? But as I learned, it was 'polite' to sign and interact with these 'fans' for a few minutes, so I did.

* * *

" _Onii-chan"_

"Yes Maki-chan?"

" _Onii-chan the target is safely inside the building ready to proceed phase 3?"_

"Ready Maki-chan. Standby"

Our target was a lawyer, but not just any lawyer. She was the lawyer of the yakuza Hinata and Hinata's rival, Asahi wanted her to be gone. So our new target was a middle aged woman, single but her room packed with bodyguards. Maki-chan counted a whole number of twelve that went in and out, but for all we know, there could be more in the lawyer's residence. It seems like Hinata really valued his lawyer that much, or maybe there already had been an attempt to get the lawyer killed. I was leaning towards the latter. There were just too many bodyguards.

Whatever. They were going to go back to Asahi and demand more money for not mentioning too many bodyguards.

" _Onii-chan, I'm at position. Positioned to cut power immediately. Waiting for next orders"_

"... Start"

As the words left my lips I sprinted towards the lawyer's house as Maki-chan cut the electricity in the lawyer's house. The house went dark and everybody began to yell. The lawyer's house definitely had a backup power so I wouldn't rely on the dark for so long. And as much as I want to make this quick by only eliminating the target and getting out safely without killing others, there were just too much people in the way so I had to kill some. With five arrows on my left hand and a crossbow on my right I shot once. Twice. Thrice.

Two bodies fell from the balcony and the security camera was broken.

Without wasting time I pulled out a spray can and sprayed it onto the glass then smashed it as it fell apart making almost no noise. A convenience item to enter places that had glass.

I sneaked in as I put back the crossbow by making it small and placing it into my bag. That boy Izayoi Sonosuke knew how to make gadgets such as these and he didn't seem to mind that he was making a man-slaughtering weapon for an unknown man. He doesn't know us but we knew him which made us gain the upper hand but he didn't seem to mind much. He silently called out the prices and when we paid he made them with no questions.

I feel vibrations from the floor. I silently wait for it and… and… and…

NOW

I pulled the trigger of my silenced gun at where I estimated it would be the throat and shot the man again in the head before he screamed. I laid the dead man gently on the floor before he crashed onto it and proceeded to move on being cautious.

I met two more and proceeded on eliminating them too.

Even when I obtained the blueprints of the house's structure, there was no way I couldn't know how the interior of the house was. I don't know if there are traps lying around in this residence and by watching these men roaming around, I wouldn't worry that much but…

Better safe than sorry.

I hurried down to where the lawyer would be as I calculated the distance of her office and the panic room that was on the the blueprints and managed to locate them. I spot five guards ushering a distressed woman in a nightie. Just when I was going to get rid of the target as I recognized her the lights flickered on.

Has it already been forty-five seconds from when I gave the order to cut the power?

An awkward moment passed when the six of their eyes met mine.

"GET HIM!"

I cursed silently as I retreated pulling out the shrapnel grenade out of my bag. Due to the mismatched timing of the lights flickering on, I wasn't able to get the target. Instead I was stuck inside the house as the men kept on firing their machine guns.

If only there weren't so many guards around this lawyer's place, I would've ended this mission silently. But the manpower this women had was ridiculously large. But, a job is a job and I want to eat.

It is true that I can buy edible goods from the enormous income but quitting too early to live a new life wasn't regarded nicely in the underground. Moreover, it was a well suited job for me and Maki-chan. I am good at sewing and I enjoy it. But I'm better at being an assassin and I enjoy being one. The reason I enjoy it isn't because I enjoy killing people. It is because it's one of the precious moments I can have with Maki-chan. Maki-chan, is bad at making clothes and she doesn't find much joy in it. So when I enjoy making garments, she does not. I want to do something with Maki-chan, something that both of us can be good at and enjoy. Something that can engrave a beautiful 'memory' in our brains. We don't talk that much at school for our different grades. We can't talk freely in the shop. We can only truly be ourselves at night, at work or at our bed snuggling. The bed felt warm and comfortable but going out is much fun than staying inside a blanket and Maki-chan agrees with me.

Maki-chan liked assassinating because it was the only thing she was good at and found at least somewhat joy in them for she loved working with me. She too would love to spend some quality time with me and she wished to do it when we were being our true selves. Those times only came when we were out to work.

"GO GO GO!" Yelled one of the men. Hmmm… considering the volume of his voice, the positioning of the walls…

I threw the grenade after pulling out the pin and hurled it towards the wall as it bounced off and went directly towards that sound.

"GET HER—"

"WATCH OUT!"

Too late.

The shrapnel grenade exploded with smoke and I charged back into the fray trying to find my target and eliminate her as fast as possible.

I found her and I pressed the trigger. Her head exploded like a watermelon as her white innocent nightwear was splattered with deep red. I sincerely thank you once again Izayoi for making these goggles that has heat sensors, night vision and three different features in it. But then again, the price was quite high.

I retreated back again not waiting to stick around. But then the wall next to me exploded.

* * *

What happened next was a series of misfortunes as everything started to explode. A searing pain was coming from my stomach but I had to get out of this place. Then it all clicked into place.

" _Onii-chan?! Onii-chan! ONII-CHAN!"_ Came the desperate voice of Maki as she screamed over the ear piece.

"Imouto, this was a trap from the start…" I groaned over the earpiece as I ran towards one of the exits that Maki-chan and I prepared just in case. I ran towards the first floor bathroom as the building once again rocked back and forth from another explosion. My left vision was blurred as my head was cut open and blood poured down covering my left side of my face. I spoke quietly over the earpiece once again avoiding using the word 'Maki-chan'. You never know if they hacked your earpiece even though it was nearly impossible to do so.

"Imouto… if they are targeting me, they must also be after you too… Go to your nest… any nest by throwing the die. Make it random. I'll contact you if I can. Good luck Imouto, start running now"

" _B-b-b-but onii-cha—"_

"NOW" I roared as another explosion took place as an orange inferno of flames nearly engulfed me if I hadn't closed the bathroom door just in time. Instead, the door was exploded off its hinges and I hit the other side of the

wall with pain wrecking my body once again.

With trembling fingers I crushed the earpiece and jammed it inside my bag and proceeded to lift a tile of the bathroom floor. A large hole was down below. We would've used this if there weren't so many people guarding that damn lawyer and we certainly wouldn't have used this if we knew this was a trap for me all along.

Could it be that Hinata and Asahi were working together? They do certainly hate each other's guts but that doesn't mean that they could work together. Have I done something to make both of them resent me? Or had this been an attempt of elimination by one group? I gritted my teeth and proceed to crawl the hole. The pain in my stomach was getting worse and I had to find a medic. It hurt so much… so much…

I kept on crawling.

I was finally out of the hole and appeared in the mountains. Blood… so much… blood…

With a flash flashlight I check my wound on my stomach to see the situation.

Shrapnel.

A piece of metal was stuck in my left abdomen and I was bleeding badly. A doctor. Or a nurse. I had to find one quick. But at the same time, I had to find one who is easy to subdue, easy to shut their mouth, easy to make them submissive so they do my bidding and never tell a soul about me.

…

…

…

Wasn't there a kouhai of mine that exactly fit that profile?

Tsumiki Mikan: A meek, shy, paranoid girl who is ruthlessly bullied by almost everyone or neglected by everyone. She was easily intimidated and saw herself as a useless being who easily offended others and asks for forgiveness by telling people to hit her until they are satisfied or exposing her skin to others if they want to(up to this day I have no idea why people are so excited of seeing one's bare skin). I saw her a few times in school and due to my 'image' maintenance I gave her help by stopping her harassers harassing her but it was temporary and that was it. No other interactions were given between us. She knew me, and I knew her. That was all we had.

Her medical performance was something that had caught my eye for she was inborn with a great talent. I easily analyzed her talent from looking at herself when she treated her own scars and bruises and sometimes helping the school nurse. She was also highly intelligent as she came in the top three in our school. Just in case, I had put her to the lists of potential allies(such as Izayoi Sonosuke) as a medic as I memorized her house address or other locations she might be when Maki-chan or I get severely injured during a mission.

I never intended to cross paths with Tsumiki Mikan but under these circumstances, it seems like I have to. If I could, I would seek help from Kuzuryū or some other people who owes me, but the distance from here to there was too long and I couldn't trust the others too much. On the other hand, Tsumiki Mikan's residence wasn't that far. Furthermore, she was easy to manipulate due to her constant paranoia of offending or boring someone. And her personality of confidence in wanting to help and to seek approval from her talents made things more easier.

Before I knew it I, riding a bicycle that I stole, hurried towards where Tsumiki Mikan was living.

* * *

"Auuuu…" Whimpered Tsumiki Mikan as she sighed and stretched her back. It was about 3:00 am in the morning and somebody was pressing the doorbell!

"Auuuu… who could it be…?" She whimpered again as she quivered in fright. Last time she checked, she paid all of the money that they ordered, and did everything they ordered her to do.

Then… then what did she doooo? What did she forget to do? Oh no, oh no, oh no! They'll hate her! They'll despise her! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…

"I'M SORRY!" She wailed as she opened up her door as she tried her best to cover up her modesty in her small nightwear. Due to the lack of money, she couldn't buy or obtain the clothing she needed except for a pink nurse outfit, her school uniform, a cyan dress, a white shirt, short jeans, and a white blouse.

"I don't remember what I was supposed to do but I'm so sorry!" She sniffled as tears blurred her vision. The figure at the door was a man and was quite tall. But there was something off about him he was breathing heavily and clutching his stomach… Is that… blood?

"Inside! Quick!" Yelled Mikan as her persona changed abruptly as she pulled in the stranger inside her room. Then she laid him on the gray sofa and finally took a good look at him with the light coming from the ceiling.

"A-a-ah… Hospital!" Stuttered Mikan shocked by the damage done to the man. "Hospital!" She shouted again as she reached for the phone but a hand that almost crushed her wrist stopped her from reaching her phone.

"No… hospitals!" The man gurgled. Even with his mask on it didn't take a genius to figure out that he was in pain. "No… doctors!" He gurgled again.

"N-no!" Yelled Mikan as she tried to squirm out of the man's grasp. "The damage is too severe! Going to the hospital is—"

"I SAID NO HOSPITALS!" The man roared in agony but not loud enough to wake up the whole neighborhood. "HEAL ME!" He ordered in pain. "You want to be a nurse? Then HEAL ME!"

For a split second Tsumiki Mikan didn't know what to do. The thought of the stranger knowing about her didn't even cross her mind. It was her duty as a nurse-in-training to stabilize the patient and escort him to the hospital on an ambulance but since her patient was refusing the hospital… and since he was relying his life on her…

"A-alright… this might… hurt"

* * *

The man said no hospitals. But he asked _her_ to help him and Tsumiki Mikan _will_ help him. She studied, and practiced, and did everything to become a nurse, and she wasn't going to back down from it. If a patient wanted help, she was going to give it to him. And she was going to enjoy doing it. By. Every. Single. Second.

She… she did it! Mikan Tsumiki finally let her breathe out as her adrenaline slowly leaked out of her. She flopped on the ground heaving heavily taking gulps of oxygen in an irregular manner. She did it, and that was what it mattered. This wasn't her first time treating a patient with severe diseases and injuries but to treat someone that was on the verge of death? This was the first time. She felt happy that she finally became useful to somebody who was less than her. She saved a life. A life so pitiful and weak that clung onto Mikan, that made themselves dependant on Mikan, that made them _believe_ in Mikan. So weak and frail that made her powerful. Feeling these emotions of superiority and satisfaction while helping the people weaker than herself gave her unmeasurable euphoria she was seeking for her entire life. At first she didn't know why she wanted to _help_ people. At first she thought it was an act out of desperation to be forgiven but as she helped, and mended, and treated, and saved, she somehow began to understand her burning desire. _Saving_ people _weaker_ than her… The feeling when the people that had once never forgiven her and forced her into submission becoming in her place as they desperately lean on Mikan… was something Mikan found exciting and pleasing. At first she was scared of choosing this path. Scared for being a failure again, scared for she wouldn't be forgiven, scared she would slip and fail, scared for she wanted acknowledgement, scared for they would still be _stronger than her_. But today, she made a big step of finding the forbidden pleasure of saving somebody weaker and fragile than her and found an ounce of confidence in her skills by saving somebody. However, as soon as it came, it went away fast and Mikan became the same shy, paranoid Mikan as she fiddled around the stranger on her gray, now red, sofa.

"Hmmm… Who can it be?" Pondered the nurse as she fidgeted on the wooden floor. Her fingers twitched above the man's mask, then she suddenly broke down in front of the man repeating the words 'I'm sorry' multiples of times.

How can she possibly even think of invading one's privacy? That's not how she should act!

' _But still'_ Thought Mikan as she rubbed her legs together. _'Right now… he is vulnerable… asleep… weak…'_

Then with the courage along with the positive emotions she received from helping the man she became full of determination to take off the man's mask. W-well, it would be rude and improper if they a nurse doesn't know their own patient, right? And when thinking what the man talked in front of her, she was certain that the man knew her. It would also be rude to not know who the man is, who took all the trouble to remember her. So, with all those good(?) intentions of Tsumiki Mikan, she with a red face and the continuous mumblings of apologetic words took off the man's mask.

…

…

…

…

…

"E-EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!" Screamed Tsumiki Mikan as she stared down at the pale face of the man that Tsumiki looked up to. The only person who she believed that had forgiven her. The only person who she _hoped_ had forgiven her. Her precious, glorious senpai. She vividly remembers her senpai coming down to her aid when she was the one at fault. Her ugly, sow face and body had apparently made some people angry and she had to repent for her mistakes but then her senpai came and made the angry people go away. Then he asked her if she needed help.

Then he said that there was nothing to forgive.

Then he said she hadn't done anything to offend him or make him disgusted.

Then he said to take care of herself.

Then, senpai's steel eyes snapped open— Wait wh—

Tsumiki Mikan's eyes bulged out of her sockets as her head slammed against the wall and senpai's large _rough_ hand clasping her throat.

"S-s-sen… pai…?" She gurgled out. Oh how naive and stupid she was! To assume that senpai was weaker and more feeble than her. To believe that senpai had forgiven her so easily. To even dare to _hope_ that senpai forgave her. Mikan's brain and eyes flooded with _despair_ as her disgusting existence and her foul heart violated her _dear_ senpai.

"S-senpai…" She gurgled again losing oxygen by the second. This was karma. She dared to presume he was fragile than her. She dared to think her wonderful senpai would actually forgive her. She dared to _hope_ senpai would be the first one to grant her forgiveness. She dared… dared to love senpai.

"I'm… s-so… s-s-sorry…" With those last words, she met black and fell asleep.

' _Senpai..._ ❤ _'_

* * *

After tying up my kouhai to her own bed with the rope I had in my bag, gagging her with a patch of cloth and tape, and blindfolding her, I decided to immediately make contact with Maki-chan. I will never let her worry or feel sad. If worse, Maki-chan may cry and it's a brother's duty to make sure their little siblings don't feel sad, and never cry.

I found a payphone and dialed Maki-chan's spare cell-phones and she answered immediately.

"People die if they are killed"

" _Just because you're correct doesn't mean you're right"_

"When you have a birthday you celebrate being born"

" _So he tends to like the people he dislikes"_

"Imouto…"

" _Oni-chan…"_

Over the payphone I heard Maki-chan sniffle and cry. Why would she cry?! I didn't make her sad by confirming my living status? Why is she crying? The only time I saw her cry was when she thought I was dead. It was a mission and our target had too much muscle. Our knives didn't went… all the way in and even when Maki-chan successfully killed the target, I got kicked in the stomach and broke several ribs. According to Maki-chan, she panicked too much and misread my pulse, thinking I was dead. Unfortunately, before I could raise my hand and signal to her that I was still alive, she started to perform CPR on me. I broke two more ribs because of that.

Then… why was she crying…?

"I-imouto…!" I said desperately not knowing what to do. "W-why are you crying?!"

" _I-I guess_ _ ***sniffle***_ _this is the…_ _ ***sniffle***_ _thing that people call_ _ ***sniffle***_ _tears of joy…"_

Ah… so she is happy. It's weird. Why would people cry if they are happy? Isn't that a contradiction? Apparently that seemed to be programmed inside our heads as I heard Maki-chan sobbing on the other end of her cell-phone.

"Imouto, imouto listen to me" I ordered over the phone. "I have to take care of stuff in here and don't come looking for me. I need you to lay low for the weekend and tell Jitsuko and Kaoruko(the two workers of our clothing shop) to take the weekend off. I'll try my best to return to base in 36 hours. Until then lay low and watch out for Hinata and Asahi. Lastly, don't forget to discard the phone"

" _... Alright onii-san. See you in 36 hours"_

"See you later imouto"

With those last words I hung up on my imouto and started to walk towards Tsumiki Mikan's residence. I could only hope that she would turn out cooperative and obedient. It would cause trouble and complications if I kill the girl when her sofa and her floor is covered with my own blood. Besides, Maki-chan and I needed a decent medic for we can't keep on relying on Fuyuhiko and on each other. Who knows what unknowable factor will drive us to downfall and tragically divide us? To make up those unknown factors, I needed to have connections with many talented people and Tsumiki Mikan was deemed as a valuable connection for us. I just never knew I would use her like this at this moment. I just never knew she would have to recognize my face. I just never thought that I would have to contemplate on killing her or keep on using her.

If I kill Tsumiki, there is a considerably dangerous chance of getting caught. Even when I ditched the bike I stole into the sewers, it can easily to found if one would make a through investigation. Also, if Tsumiki was to be killed, I would have to try my best to get rid of my blood and other body fluids that had escaped my body. Unfortunately, that task is impossible for me to do so for my blood drenched her sofa, made a huge puddle on the floor, and made considerably large amounts of blood splatters on her porch and the staircase to her apartment which I just wiped off after being treated so nobody can notice the color red and call the police leading me to trouble. Even if I set her residence up on fire using gas, that would gain certain attention from Hinata or Asahi, narrowing down where I have ran off to.

On the other hand, if I let her live, there is also a high risk where she can slip and blow my cover.

…

…

…

I need to have more time to think about this carefully and have a long conversation with my kouhai. But first, I am hungry and I need to eat.

…

…

…

Where was Tsumiki's refrigerator again?

* * *

 **... Uh... I'm _not_ sorry if you're pissed for writing a new story. I always wanted to do a Tsumiki Mikan x OC/Any kind male character, and I just had to do it. I'm a writer and I write what I want to write. So suck it up.**

 **Also... about the yakuza Hinata... This yakuza Hinata has nothing to do with Hajime Hinata, the main protagonist in "Danganronpa 2: Goodbye Despair". I just chose the most used Japanese male name from google. I'm sorry for not considering overlapping names but... what is done is done. I'm sorry if you get confused, but live with it.**

 **Review, fav, follow. Go crazy people.**

 **P.S I'm sorry if I put the Fate stuff in the middle. Frankly, I just wrote it like that without realizing what I have done. Sorry Fate fans... but if you find it funny then that's good!**


	2. Chapter 2: Taste the Problem(edited)

**All I want for Christmas~ is you~ senpai~!**

 **Okay. That was a horrible joke. Besides that lets check who took their precious time to read my fanfic. Oh-ho~ Thank you for your support LizzyLovesPink, doomqwer, and icogz98! I'll try my best!**

 **doomqwer: Yeah... thank you for cheering me doom, I'll try my best to make things more messed up than it was before! :D**

 **ON WITH THE STORY!**

* * *

Tsumiki Mikan woke up to be bound to a certain place, gagged so no sound could possibly escape from her, blindfolded so no light entered her vision. She tried to squirm even the slightest bit but moving was an impossible task for her to do.

Senpai… was senpai okay? Even when Mikan did her best to help to heal senpai, senpai was still in a condition where he shouldn't move around. Senpai… Auuu… her sin deep from her heart, her sin of loving the untouchable buried deep within her soul as it tormented her constantly and there was no way for her to ease the pain physically as the bindings held her in place.

No sight, no sound except for the large pounding that came from her heart, and trapped in bondage, the nurse-in-training could only wait for her senpai's divine punishment to befall on her. Or… had the punishment already begun?

…

…

…

NO! Her punishment should be worse than this! She deserved to be whipped by senpai, she deserved to be humiliated by senpai, she deserved to be a doormat for senpai, she deserved to strip in front of senpai and humiliate herself!

…

…

…

N-not that she wanted anything like that! It just seemed to be the rightful punishment for her! Yes! That was it! Right?! Right…?

Suddenly the sound of the door opening came into Mikan's ears as she subtly moved her body as much as she can. Was it senpai? No! Silly Mikan! Her beloved senpai would never take his time to visit this sinful Mikan! He absolutely cannot—

"Tsumiki Mikan" Came her cool, heavenly voice. Oh, _oh_ how sweet it was and how cool it sounded. Her senpai's voice. It really was her senpai. Her senpai had actually wasted his time to talk to her or was this some kind of altered reality where her minds were playing tricks on her?

"Height: 161cm, weight: 47kg, blood type: A, class 2–B, class number 21" Here, senpai took a pause. Maybe it was to catch his breath. Ah… even the thought of being with senpai in a room made Mikan feel weird sensations that crept across her chest like a burning trail of fire lighting one tree to another. But her sinful mind first needed to be forgiven for her to feel that emotion for her senpai.

B-but wait! Please wait a moment! Why would senpai know so much about Mikan?! Why would he?! There was no way senpai would care for worthless Mikan! There was no way! No way! Then how?!

…

Yes… This was her punishment. A neverending torment of her dreams and desires, her _hope_ of the man who had spoken, the man who had forgiven her to be her senpai, but never reaching the knowledge of the simple truth of the identity of the man who was currently speaking out loud her personal information. It sounded like senpai, and oh how Mikan _desired_ , _hoped_ the man to be her senpai.

Please… could they please forgive her now? Would this cruel reality forgive Mikan for just a day, just a hour, just a minute so she could peek out of her blindfold to see who was talking? Would it please let her _hope_ become true?

"Helped in the nurse's office multiples of times. In service days went to clinics and helped ill people. Took all the medical programs in school. Had an unsuccessful medical club. High levels of medical performances witnessed several times in school"

Mikan could only wait in the painful bondage of _hope_ as she still tried her best to squirm.

"Shy, timid, and constantly bullied. Obvious signs of physical injuries on legs, arms and face. Never puts up a fight nor does push back the tormentors"

Please… _please… Just… forgive her even if it is a lie…_

"Unfortunately, that was my best knowledge of you Tsumiki Mikan"

Then the cage of darkness was lifted as a ray of light from her lamp shown into her eyes allowing her to see the truth of her _hope._ At first she couldn't believe it. Then she realized that what she was seeing was reality itself. Then she was overflowed with happiness. No… that wasn't happiness… That was _euphoria._

Senpai sat directly next to her. Even when it was weird to think that she didn't hear the sounds of footsteps it didn't really much matter as her eyes confirmed that her senpai was using her chair to sit right next to her. Wait-wait! Her… _chair?_

…

…

…

Her room! Her room! N-n-n-no! It's too good to be true! _It's too good to be true!_ Her senpai in her room?!

' _Ah…'_ Thought the nurse as her eyelids fluttered. _'I have no regrets in my life…'_

However, her senpai was giving her no time to fantasize more. His rough hands grabbed Mikan's cheeks with his thumb and his four fingers and held tight but not too tight.

"Right now, I'll be taking off your gag ball. If you scream or make any kind of sound without my permission, I will punch your stomach five times. However, when you are given a question by me, you will do anything you will answer it, in a whisper. And if you lie…"

?! N-no! Wait senpai! Please wait for this unworthy, dirty sow! Please hear her disgusting please! Please don't lean towards her! Her heart wasn't ready for her senpai's face to be this much close! _Noooooooooo!_

"... I'll take off the skin from the soles of your foot. As a nurse-in-training, I expect you must know how much it would hurt if I do that. Also, I will know if you are lying or not judging your heartbeat, your eyes and your sweat. So don't. Lie. To. Me."

Auuuuuu… Mikan… needs to reboot…

As Mikan soon grasped her consciousness she found that the gag that were held between her lips disappeared but the ache of water approached her throat as it was dry as a desert.

"Here, drink"

! **!**! Her senpai… feeding her? This was a work of a devil! A devil who came to the living world just to pick on the most worthless sow on earth! Mikan knew it was! This was too good to be just an illusion! It was just too good for an unforgiven girl as her!

Her body was on autopilot as her head was spinning so dizzily, so she didn't notice herself sucking on her own water bottle as her throat cried out in joy as the liquid went through her body. Then she started to speak as her sore throat had somewhat less painful then before.

"A-ano—" She didn't even get to finish her sentence as her senpai's left hand clasped her lips shutting her up as his right hand rose to the air and…

 **SMACK**

Mikan's eyes bulged as she felt the impact hit her wide open stomach. Of… course… it was too good to be true. Or was it?

" _If you scream or make any kind of sound without my permission, I will punch your stomach five times"_

A-ah… of course… Her stupid self couldn't even follow her beloved senpai's order. That was why senpai had not forgiven her. She… deserved this…

 **SMACK**

 **SMACK**

 **SMACK**

 **SMACK**

Mikan was crying now as tears of pain leaked out of her eyes wetting her already drool soaked face even more. Even when she knew nothing broke in her stomach, she could already feel an ugly purple bruise starting to form on her stomach. Stupid Mikan. Stupid Mikan! Making her beloved senpai angry! How could she?

Mikan with newfound determination forged by her punishment decided to follow her senpai's orders. She would never make him angry! She would do her best to make senpai happy and hopefully earn his forgiveness!

Then her senpai's hand crept up to her chest! Eeeeeeeeeep! Senpai! Wait! Stop! Mikan is not ready! She didn't shower properly and must smell bad!

"..." Mikan, obviously unable to voice her inner thought closed her mouth obediently with her face slowly becoming red.

"Good. Where are your parents or guardians?"

"T-they aren't here senpai… th-they usually spend their time outside and t-they r-r-r-rarely come home…"

"... Did you tell my severe condition to anyone?"

"N-no senpai…"

"... Have you made contact with anyone while I was unconscious?"

"N-no senpai…"

"... Have you left your apartment since I came here?"

"N-no senpai…"

"... Have you been at the balcony since I came here?"

"N-no senpai…"

"Where were you then?"

"E-eh?"

"Where were you while I was unconscious?"

"I-I… I stayed next… to… _you…"_

Mikan lowered her head in shame and giddiness as the memories came flooding back towards her brain. Her cheeks flushed once again as she recalled the memories of tending her patient who was senpai. She didn't know it was her senpai when the man came to her. She didn't know underneath the mask would be the face of the man she loved deeply. But now to think that that man was senpai all along… made Mikan tremble with love.

"... All the time, you stayed next to me?"

" _Y-yes_ " Whispered Mikan, her face red as the evening sky.

"..."

Mikan squirmed uncomfortably as she was under her senpai's piercing gaze. Oh her heart. Her poor heart was beating too fast that it almost gave her arrhythmia. She tried to control her excited heart by controlling her breath, but it did nothing as her breath started to greedily suck oxygen, getting faster by each second.

Meanwhile, her senpai was staring at her, deep into her, touching her dirty heart with his gaze, exposing her filthy soul with his sight. Tsumiki Mikan then realized, that she was drowning in her senpai's eyes, which were wide as an ocean and cold as steel, trapped and cast away.

* * *

"... Will your parents mind if you leave your house?"

Right now, I was quite confused by my kouhai's behavior. Did I tie her up too hard to result her to breath uncomfortably, or is she sick?

As for the interrogation it was going on smoothly, but too smoothly that made me uncomfortable. Each answer she gave was full of honesty that sent me into confusion. Did my kouhai have ultimate lying skills? No… it is nearly impossible to control one's heartbeat even with the vast amount of medical/anatomy knowledge, let alone hide any signs of lying from my view. Her blood told the truth, her eyes told the truth, her body told the truth. There was no way she was lying about anything but… something is off in her way of behavior. Something that I wouldn't categorize as normal. Then again, I wouldn't be surprised if she wasn't normal.

Tsumiki Mikan was an outstanding individual who was treated worthless and due to the constant negative feedback around her, she herself deemed her worthless and trained hard to become someone worth something which only increases her value.

Either than her useful talents that makes her unique, her mindset was far from normal. She had the weakest, yet the strongest mind in my opinion. Her spirits were weak like a pathetic wax candle as it waved lightly as the direction the breeze blew. She believed what her peers, her tormentors told her, as others neglected her. However, her will was surprisingly strong. Her will to prove herself has brought her up to be a talented nurse, and to be determined not to be a useless, dirty creature.

Quite an interesting individual I must comment. A pitiful, pathetic, but nevertheless, interesting individual.

Anyways, back to my interrogation.

Right now, I was making a stretch here as I made a hasty conclusion to Mikan's relationship with her guardians. I knew Mikan was a neglected girl from the start, but I wasn't sure on what level of neglection she received from her parents. Tsumiki Mikan might have had parents who loved their daughter, but was unfortunate to interact with their daughter due to the immense amount of work. Tsumiki Mikan may have had parents who cared for their daughter, but was unfortunate to interact with their daughter due to their lack of knowledge of how to deal with children.

But if I piece the evidence based on her interior of her house, I could guess that her parents were the parents who truly did not care for their daughter. When I inspected every part of her room, I have found three clues that led me to believe Mikan's parents were indifferent toward their daughter.

Clue number 1. There were no family photos. I mean, literally, none.

Even Maki-chan and I have three whole photos albums taken together, and we weren't even 'normal'.

When I searched the drawers, closets and even the internet, I couldn't find a photo of Tsumiki Mikan with her parents.

Clue number 2. The house was maintained by Tsumiki Mikan alone and her parents seldom came home. The way of the clothes folded were all the same in everywhere. The shirts were folded in the same manner, the pants were tucked away identically, the suits were hung similarly. The house, was pretty much maintained by Tsumiki Mikan herself, and by judging the lack of adult clothes in the house and a thin layer of dust covering the suits and the dresses, I could easily guess that these guardians, rarely come home or even put their stuff in here.

Clue number 3. Tsumiki Mikan's lack of resources and money. The moment I opened the refrigerator I was shocked and confused. My kouhai was an intellectual girl who knew vast amounts of medical knowledge that even I couldn't possibly compare to. But for her to lack food which contains all the vital nutrients, vitamins, proteins and etcetera? But to only have two items in the fridge which were two pieces of bananas and yogurt? The fact of the items in the refrigerator sent me into confusion, doubting my kouhai's sense of medical knowledge as I ate the two bananas and the yogurt that I found in her fridge.

Thankfully, they satisfied me by driving hunger away but my curiosity drove me to start up a search for food. Nowhere did I find anything edible except for a few vitamin pills, running water, a biscuit, and salt.

Was it possible that this nurse-in-training did not know how important eating was? Or… did she lack the money to buy food for herself? If that was the case, this was some serious level of neglecting. Even 'Father' never forgot to feed all of us, although the unprofessional kids got only a quarter of the stew. Sometimes less depending on 'Father's mood.

These three evidences had led me to believe that Tsumiki Mikan was a neglected child and because of that I was making a stretch here. A stretch that could break but would not matter much. There are alternative paths to mend a broken bridge.

"Uhhh… I… think…"

"Be sure"

"Ahhh… Uhhh…"

I raised my fist my bloodlust flaring with my pupils shrinking with intimidation. Fear is the best motivation for everyone.

"They don't care! They don't care!"

My hand which was going to go for her stomach immediately went to her mouth clamping it shut.

"What did I say about keeping it quiet?"

Mikan's eyes widened up with fear as tears once again threatened to come out of her eyes. Even when her cries weren't that loud and barely above an average tone I had to be careful. You can never be sure if her neighbors have sensitive ears or not.

…

? Lying? I finally realized that my kouhai had given her first lie of the night. But then again her face suddenly turns guilty and frightened and sad(?) as she realizes her dishonest answer.

…

What should I do? Skin her feet like I have promised?

…

I have already given her the whip. I believe the carrot comes next. An equal exchange must be made.

* * *

Auu… Stupid Mikan! Stupid Mikan! I should've been quiet! I should've been obedient!

Mikan felt like crying. Just a few moments ago she resolved herself to follow her senpai's orders like a dutiful whore to her master and never make a stupid mistake once again. But look at her. Look at her! Disobeying her senpai like that! Forgetting such a simple order like that! She can't make another mistake! She can't!

B-but…

Her tears! Her tears! They're threatening to leak out of her eyes! A pitiful moan of sorrow and self-hate started to climb up her throat and come out of her mouth. Her mouth that senpai had to clamp upon trembled to open and yet out her disgusting cries of sadness. How dare she… how dare she make her senpai's beautiful rough hand cover her dirty lips? This was blasphemy! Blasphemy to her senpai!

Her senpai's fist sent her to terror as she gave an uncertain answer that drove her to shout out her thoughts of her parents instinctively. No. She doubted if they would care but then… Her parents…

…

…

She didn't know if they would miss her or not.

It's been too long since Mikan saw them and truly, the reason her answer was vague was because she had no idea. It has been too long since she had seen her mother. It has been too long since she had heard from her father. She couldn't even remember their faces even if she tried. Her parent's face… changed constantly in her head. Her mother's skin was pale but how pale? Or was it slightly tanned? How big was her father? Was he tall and husky or was he short and stout? Most importantly, what were their ideals and thoughts against Mikan? It is clear that they haven't forgiven Mikan like senpai had done for her, but do they care?

…

She… she didn't know for sure… H-how can she not remember her parents clearly?! But that was not the point here. The actual important thing was her failure to her senpai. Her useless brain with her useless memories… She had lied to her senpai and the punishment of skinning was about to fall upon her.

"If I were to follow my words, I should skin the soles of your feet right now" Said senpai his voice never above a whisper. Tsumiki Mikan urged her whimpering to stay silent.

"However…"

? What… what was her senpai doing? Why… why was he closing his face to hers?! This wasn't fair! This wasn't a fair treatment to a sinner, a disgusting sow like her! Or… or…

…

…

…

Or has her senpai forgiven her, again? Too kind! Her senpai was too kind!

"I'll let this slide for once"

Too kind!

"I am currently quite impatient unlike myself and it seems like torturing you to such an extent of skinning the soles of your foot when you are in such a poor condition, it won't win me any favors of getting information out of you"

Auuuu…

"So I'll ask you one more time, and I order you to speak truthfully. Would. Your. Parents. Care?"

"I… I don't know" Hushed Mikan, truthfully. She spoke with absolute truthfulness as she stared at the steel eyes of her senpai as his eyes were going, changing rapidly as they digested her words. Then his mouth opened and uttered his sentence that sent Mikan to her deepest despair but to her highest hopes, her stomach churned as if a brutal storm was waging through her bloodstream with such a glorious yet a sickening sensation as her mind fought a raging war inside her heart of _what to do and what to say._

"Tsumiki Mikan, starting from tomorrow, I will start my cohabitation with you in your residence"

* * *

Yes… this was the best option. This was the best option I could think of right now.

Tension. An invisible string of tension started to stretch and stretch inside my heart. Was it my gut telling me to hurry up for the inevitable danger that was approaching me at a fast pace? Was my mind ordering me to leave this place as fast as possible to completely get Hinata and Asahi off my tail? What is this sudden adrenaline accumulating inside my heart, my bloodstream, my mind?

No… I am not making a stretch here. I am most certain of this. Tsumiki Mikan is a neglected child. So neglected that she doesn't even know for sure if her parents were going to be worried for her absence. A child who knows part of my other identity, a child who has abilities that are extremely useful for my other persona, a child who had nothing to lose except for her talents. A child who would be so useful in my hands.

So I have invited myself to her home. So, I have told her become my personal nurse in her own home. So, I have asked her that I was going to stay in her house. So, I have asked her to be a slave for me but not for Maki-chan. Tsumiki Mikan doesn't know the relationship between me and Maki-chan, and most don't. Even at school, we try our best not to show our relationship too much, and we did such a good job that only a few teachers would remember that we were 'siblings', or related. The nurse-in-training doesn't need to know our relationship, and it'll be better for Maki-chan and I if she didn't know forever.

I can't kill, I can't lock her up, and I can't let the public to notice one of their citizen to go missing. If I do that Asahi and Hinata will immediately notice it and come for Maki's and my head. I can't allow that. Nobody, _nobody_ is allowed to break our happiness between Maki-chan and I. I would assassinate them before that happens.

However, there were a few problems with this plan of mine. It wouldn't take long for Asahi and Hinata to find out that I was in this area. For certain, the _somebody_ who was planning on killing me would find out how I sneaked out and if _they_ are struck with _sheer luck,_ they can find my tracks that leads them to Tsumiki Mikan's residence. But for now, they would set up a perimeter starting from where they had found the exit of my escape route. Or they can assume that I ran off to where the blood trails are shown which in reality I went the other way after making a false trail. Keeping the blood from flowing out was the hardest part but I managed to do that by burning myself by breaking the lighter and soaking my palm with butane. Then with a little spark, I let my hand on fire and pressed it hard against my wound burning both my hand and my wound in the process. Although the burnt flesh re-opened at Tsumiki Mikan's apartment and painted the walls and the floor red, I was able to clean up the evidence without leaving any trace and without any witnesses, or so I hope.

But, this meant that I would spend less time with Maki-chan. That was the whole downfall of this plan. Even if Maki-chan came to live with Tsumiki Mikan and I, somebody must frequently go to our house to maintain our weapons and supplies. Which meant that there would be days when I won't stay with Maki-chan during the night.

The way to solve that problem was to kidnap Mikan and force her to live under our roof, but if that happened… there was a chance where their parents may find out that their daughter was missing and report the incident to the authorities.

Our identity remaining as a secret is much important than sacrificing some of our time with each other. I couldn't let the risk of getting one of us going to prison. In prison, there is a higher chance of getting killed, a high chance of getting raped, a high chance of a sudden decrease of happiness, and a higher chance of never meeting again.

But, why is this submissive girl looking at me with a look of horror in her eyes? What part of this declaration drives her to pure dread?

…

When people are scared, they listen. But, when people are terrified, they are likely to do anything. Tsumiki Mikan's eyes resembled a wolf backed up into a corner— wait. No. That was a completely wrong metaphor. Let's try it again. Tsumiki Mikan's eyes resembled a bunny who is about to be eaten by a wolf. Now, the bunny knows she is good as dead meat, but she will try her best to escape the situation from the overwhelming amount of fear. Tsumiki Mikan's eyes reminded me of that. She was struck with fear that she was willing to do anything to escape the wave of fear.

…

Was it something that I have said? Well… I have no thoughts of choosing a different path for the future. The decision of cohabitating with Tsumiki Mikan is fixed and I have no intention to change it. But, if she is scared half to death by my decision, that would conjure some serious problems for she would probably do anything to stay away from my decision. But, I have no intention of going back to my decision because that is the most reasonable way of keeping Maki-chan and my identity safe. If this is the case…

…

…

…

There is only one conclusion I can think of. I must train Tsumiki Mikan and brainwash her in the span of 51 hours. 51 hours because today is Saturday 4:00 am and I usually arrive at school at 7:00 am which starts at Monday. I need to train her so she would completely submit to my desires and my orders, I need to brainwash her so that she doesn't feel fear from whatever reason.

The type of fear from Tsumiki Mikan is the fear that resonates from the person's deep inside soul, and it is something I cannot fix in a span of 51 hours. However, brainwashing was different. I am positive I can break the mind of Tsumiki Mikan and reform it into what I desire. Tsumiki Mikan has a weak mind, and a strong one. The strong mind of Tsumiki Mikan operates through her weak mind as it believes in anything what her tormentor tells her. Since that is how the mind of Tsumiki Mikan works, I shall be her 'tormentor' and control her 'strong mind' by attacking her 'weak mind'.

Although there are many things that could go wrong after I reprogram Tsumiki Mikan's mind, I have to do this. This is the only possible way, the most safe possible way of getting out of this mess. Whatever happens, all that I want is to live happily with Maki-chan and stay away from hunger.

…

It seems like Tsumiki Mikan wouldn't be able to talk about anything and I promised Maki-chan that we would reunite in 36 hours…

…

Before the situation gets more complicated, it seems that this is the greatest opportunity for me to meet Maki-chan and converse with her of what has happened. Probably, with a good chance of luck, she might come up with a better idea of a way to solve this problem. But, first things come first. As much as I would love to leave this place as fast as I can, I have to put my kouhai in a state of pure, absolute, fixed bondage. I brought the blindfold and the gag up to her face when I realized that Tsumiki Mikan had been whispering _something_ to herself, or possibly to me. I leaned closer to hear what she was whispering about.

" _N...no"_

?

" _N…o… please… don't do that… no… more… no… more…"_

Eyes, wide and scared. Skin, flushed. Tears, streaming. Voice, choking. Heart, beating ferociously.

Just… just what is going inside this kouhai's head?

* * *

' _This dream… it hurts…_

…

 _I thought this dream was a salvation for me… that this dream was one of my dirty, improper fantasies of senpai… or perhaps this was part of my pitiful mind, trying to comfort me with these delusional dream…_

…

 _But no… it was neither…_ _ **this was torture.**_

…

 _I should've figured it out sooner but this… this was torture… Like a ranch owner treating his pigs. The devil who took the form of senpai was the ranch owner, and I was the sow. Senpai was feeding me hope, more and more hope. So much hope that my stupid face was stuffed with it. That my dirty body was drenched with it. That my sinful head was drunk with it. That I was drowning in it._

…

 _I'm… I'm dying… Senpai… the devil is killing me. My mind… my mind is crumbling away… it's breaking apart…_

…

 _I still remember his beautiful voice as if he were an angel from heaven to save me from my pathetic, sinful self… I thought… I believed that senpai might be the one to forgive me… please… please let senpai forgive me…_

…

 _But this… this is far more than just forgiveness… this is doubt… a large dose of doubt that was drugging my vein, my bloodstream… Living… with… me? Senpai… living with me… in the same room… under the same roof…? Ah… Ahahahahahahaha…_

…

…

…

 _ **AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…**_

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 _Such… a bad dream… just a… sinful… disgusting mind I have…_

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 _a… a girl like me… can't even… serve senpai… I am not qualified… I am a disgusting sow senpai… you… you deserve more than me and you know it… so please… enough… enough…_

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 _I'm… I… am… going… crazy_

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 _Haha… my… beautiful senpai… please… don't dirty… your beautiful skin… with my dirty soul… Please… don't breathe in the air… I share with you… Please… please go away from me senpai… I… I am too dirty for you…_

…

 _I'm… not worthy… to serve you… yet'_

* * *

 **Currently, Tsumiki Mikan views her senpai as a literal 'GOD', and herself as an unworthy worshiper. That was why crazy shit was going inside the girl's head. And it may seem weird that the protagonist suddenly jumped to the conclusion of 'taming' Mikan, but seriously, that was the best idea he could get. People, if you have to keep a big secret and a person who happens to have a weak mindset and an extremely submissive soul knows that secret, the second best thing you could do to keep that secret is to keep that sub on a tight leash(the best way is 'dead men tell no tales'). Besides that, I didn't do anything wrong or illogical did I? Meh, if you have any suggestions or if you can point out something wrong in this story I would be grateful.**

 **Criticism is always welcome and don't forget to fav, follow, and REVIEWS!**

 **West Door out!**

 **P.S. What am I doing, writing another fanfiction when I have five unfinished stories... T_T**


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